As Long As She's Healthy

This is a post that piggybacks on my last post Trying for a Boy?  That post was already getting long, and with these being 2 separate thoughts--although related--I decided to write them as 2 separate posts.

As I was shopping one day for a few odds and ends, a dear old lady, whose intentions were only good {really--she was sweet as can be}, came up and started a conversation.  It's a familiar one. I was about 8 months pregnant and had both my girls with me.

"Your girls are beautiful. Oh, I see you're having another one? Now, what are we hoping for, dear?  I bet daddy wants a boy."

Kaylee was quick to reply, "Nope, God is giving us another girl.  Her name is Natalie.  This is my sister Kara and I'm Kaylee.  This is my mom, Cassie."

The lady smiled as she replied.  "Oh, I bet Dad wishes he had a boy."  {Again, I addressed why this statement bothers me in my last post.}

I tried to sound gracious as I responded to her, "Actually, we're all very excited to meet this little one and see who God has chosen to give us."

This little old lady, still with super sweet intentions said, "I love your perspective.  I'm sure you will love whoever you have, as long as she's healthy."

As long as she's healthy.  This statement hit me so much differently than it normally would have.

People really can say these things with good intentions.  And I am sure I have said so many of these same things before.  But the more I live life as a mom, the more I am stunned by these types of conversations. The thoughts of our society astound me.  The idea that I would love a boy-child more than a girl-child is hard to imagine as a mom.  The idea that I will only love my child as long as she's healthy, sickens me.  It places a condition on the child.  I will love you IF.  If you are healthy...  So, don't you even THINK about being born with a disease that is out of your control.  God, You wouldn't give ME a sick baby.

Again, I realize that, YES, it is easier to have healthy children.  Yes, we don't WISH for anyone to be sick, especially not our child. We pray for healthy babies.  We desire healthy babies.  But, in light of many things in the news recently, such as this story about a Dad refusing to give up his son with Down Syndrome, I am realizing that things like this shouldn't be said.  It's sad that these statements are actually becoming reality. People actually ARE rejecting their children because of a health condition that is outside of their control.  I am so thankful that this dad didn't reject his son because of his health condition. His value is still as great as my value and yours.  He is created in the image of God, Down Syndrome and all.

I have so many friends whose children have illnesses and special needs that are hard to diagnose or define.  Even if they are definable, they are difficult to manage and full of unknowns.  These parents haven't stopped loving their children.  Instead, I see hearts who grieve for their child over his or her illness--not because of the inconvenience that it causes them {and by all means, illness is not easy to deal with}--because they love their child so incredibly much that it causes them pain to see them in such a state.  They desire healthy bodies because they wish their child didn't suffer.  But at the same time, they are willing to go through this hard path because they couldn't imagine doing life without that child no matter the cost. They are willing to go through this hard time in life because it allows God to teach them things that they would otherwise miss.

In these parents, I see the love of God.  I am sick with sin, yet God the Father loves me.  He loves me and He sent His Son to die for me so that one day I can receive a body restored.